La Wlooo!!!…How Facebook Changes Whenever I Blink

Once again, with all the constant updates going on in the world of Facebook, how can I resist writing yet another entry about our beloved social networking website? Don’t get me wrong – I love Facebook, from the heart of my bottom. I’m addicted to it just like almost everyone else on this planet. But once again I must ask, WHY all the updates and changes? Are they intended to make our lives easier? Because all I hear are complaints.

Especially now, with the launch of the useless Google+, I am guessing the Facebook team felt the need to revamp their website and funny enough, copy certain Google+ privacy settings. WHY?
If you want to update your status now or post something, you can manually decide what group of your friends is privileged enough to view it. Well, I’m sure there are many people like me who have not taken a week off their life to divide friends, acquaintances, strangers, haters and stalkers into separate groups, so how is this making things easier for us? We now have to take a day off from work to sort out the people we like from the people we don’t like. Maybe the Facebook team should create “stalker detection” and “hater detection” options that forbid these people from seeing anything about their “friends”. Now that’s an update I’d appreciate.  
Or, in a perfect world, we’d delete the people we do not like and vice versa. This would spare us and the Facebook team the drama.

I was just getting used to that horrid new way of displaying photos. I still hated it, but I was used to it. Of course that had to be changed too, to a higher level of annoying. Now Photos are displayed with a white background instead of a black one. Call me petty, but yes the color change upset my balance! Not only that, but upon clicking on a photo, it remains blurry for half a day before you can actually see it clearly. This doesn’t allow for quick untagging anymore. Now a photo can remain on display for a good couple of hours (for the world to see) as you’re waiting for the blurriness to subside. Once that’s done, good luck finding the “remove tag” button that’s been moved 45 times in the past five years.

Photos are now for the world to see . . . and for the world to comment on. Okay, I’m not totally complaining about this one, but what if someone doesn’t want certain people to see certain tagged photos? What if someone *cough* – me – doesn’t want Damika Tobediki or her 16 cousins (who I don’t know) commenting on the photos I tag of my friends? I know, I sound selfish. I love the fact that my friends can comment on my tagged photos, so I guess I shouldn’t mind my friends’ friends commenting on the photos I’ve tagged . . . but it’s annoying!

God forbid you try to untag yourself. It is now a long and dreary process. Scratch that, it’s an invasive interrogation. Must I explain why I want to remove a certain photo from my profile?
“Why would you like to remove this photo? Were you abused by someone in this photo? Is it being used to blackmail you? Were you raped by the person that tagged you? Are you having nightmares at night because of this photo? Or indigestion perhaps?”
And as if that weren’t enough, “Would you like to ask the person that tagged you to delete this photo? Or DEMAND that it be deleted? Force action? Banish it to hell? Or would you just like it deleted from your photos?”
Dear God, does it matter?! I want it removed ASAP because I look like an overjoyed one-eyed hippo with a crooked mouth. Facebook apparently does not understand vanity.
If you haven’t experienced how ridiculous the untagging procedure is, I urge you to give it a whirl.

Facebook’s homepage will always be my world’s eighth wonder; especially the upper right hand side of the screen. With each new update comes a new reason for you to want to scream, break your laptop or just weep in private.
NO Facebook, I do not care about my friends’ photos that were taken in prehistoric times and I certainly do not care to gaze at them, remember them or comment on them three years after they’ve been posted . . . like a stalker! Just imagine getting a comment on a picture that you uploaded in 2008 and forgot about. You’d think, “Okay, this person is weird. Why is she going through my old albums all of a sudden? Is she obsessed with me or is she very bored?” This is the type of awkwardness we all want to avoid, n’est-ce pas?
NO Facebook I do not care to see my ancient status updates that I “wrote on this very day in 2009.” The trick is to look forward not dwell in the past. I just don’t see the effing point in this!
Oh, and NO Facebook I do not care to add the people I may know. “People you may know” are not on my friends list for a good reason and I’d do much better without the awkwardness of seeing their names pop up on my screen every other day.

No matter what though, I will always love Facebook, unlike Google+ which I hate with a passion, a passion that I will be demonstrating next week. We can all complain that Facebook is an invasion of privacy (blah blah) but we can each determine how much we put out there by configuring our privacy settings . . . if we can actually find them in this obnoxious new layout. If you simply don’t want to share anything with anyone, you can enjoy the privacy of your inbox . . . that’s where all the interesting things happen anyway *wink*. In any case, Facebook has been a daily fixation for many of us. We are familiar with it and got used to it. I just hope it doesn’t change to the extent that it loses what made it appealing to so many in the first place – then I’d have to move to another social networking website and I don’t think I have the energy to start from scratch again . . . especially not with Google+.
I have no words of wisdom today, except “CHILL ZUCKERBERG! Easy on the updates, you’re giving us vertigo!”

“I started the site when I was 19. I didn’t know much about business back then.” Mark Zuckerberg

(That can justify all the changes . . . not!)