Nightlife Undercover: Couples Vs. Clubbing

April 19, 2012  

Posted by in Featured, NightLife 

11 responses 

 

Greetings BNLer’s, allow me to introduce myself. I am the nightlife editor for BeirutNightLife.com. On a weekly basis I attend awesome clubs/events and attempt to bring them to life for you all to enjoy, but alas I have been keeping something from you…the ugly side of nightlife. Lebanon’s nightlife encompasses many dirty little secrets, taboos and some might say an ugly side. Starting today I am going to expose these pesky issues in a monthly column entitled Nightlife Undercover…enjoy!

Clubbing ruined my relationship…Well, not mine personally but I have heard that, or some kind of variation of that, many times before. So riddle me this Batman, was it clubbing that ruined my friend’s relationships or was it their own insecurities? I had to dig a little deeper…

First let’s dissect different kind of relationships you see in clubs (these are just a few examples from a long list of others).

A. The married couple attempting to live it up like the old days.
B. The fresh new couple that is under the impression the club is their bedroom.
C. The over confident couple who you can’t even tell are together.

Although all very different they are all doomed, if they go out clubbing on the regular basis of course…

A. The married couple attempting to live it up like the old days, we see them out all of the time. The man usually doused in way too much cologne, holding a glass of whisky, that he pretty much baby sits all night because his doctor says to watch his alcohol intake especially while smoking a cigar…you know the one he must have to indicate he has money (and lots of it). His beautiful wife of 15+ years is wearing a dress that you would see on someone who is 15+ years, wearing a years supply of make up and grasping tightly her must have Louis Vuitton bag, the one that indicates she has money (and lots of it). Ok, all jokes aside, I don’t think it is wrong to club when you are married on the contrary I praise couples who are married and enjoy a night out together. There is nothing that says love more than enjoying time out with your husband or wife after 15+ years, cheers to couple A! I like them a hell of a lot more than couple…

B. The fresh new couple that is under the impression the club is their bedroom.

Get a grip! And get a room for that matter. Here’s the thing, guys I know to other guys you look like a player pimp who is macking down on some girl at a club but to all the other respectable girls in the club you look like a pig…not to mention you just ruined your shot with hooking up with any of them once your relationship, that is inevitably headed towards failure, ends. And to the girl who graciously showed me her bra while getting felt up by her beloved last week, you look nothing but cheap. I always see the same thing from this couple, when I enter the club they are swapping spit at the bar and when I leave the club they are in the corner fighting over why he looked at another girl, or why his friend knows what color bra she has…”lesh habbi, please mat oul hek, ana bhebak” isn’t going to save your relationship but being a nice classy couple that sneaks kisses here and there, a couple winks and casual hand holding will absolutely do the trick! But by all means don’t act like couple…

C. The over confident couple who you can’t even tell are together…I know it is good to be confident and to trust your lover but when you are at one table and your boyfriend is at another or even worse you don’t feel like going out so you let your significant other just go alone…hmmmm makes me wonder why you don’t wonder if someone else is hitting on him or her. Oh wait here’s a thought…you couldn’t care less. When your club time is more important than your significant other there is a problem and I suggest to breaking up now or forever hold your whatever the opposite of peace is.

Now that we dug into the types of couples let’s quickly touch on what drives said couples to fight or even worse break up because of clubbing

1. Alcohol induced banter: When drinking the ugly inside makes its way up and comes out of your mouth in the form of words. A guy knows not to look at another girl when sober but a nice young gentleman with 5 vodka Red Bull’s in his tummy will most certainly let out a “ya wayleeeee chou taybeee” when a sexy girl walks by. On the other hand your girlfriend loves you but after 4 martinis this might slip “daklak leh behebak la illak iza Joe 3endo ajdad Porshe b Libnan?

2. Dressed to impress: Even if you are in a relationship you will get decked out to the 9’s when going out clubbing. Not only will your significant other notice but also so will everyone of the opposite sex. Just because you can’t look doesn’t mean they can’t. That bothers boyfriends/girlfriends, which will create tension, making way for a fight.

3. Agree at home, disagree at a club: When you are spending evenings together at home it’s just the two of you, love is in the air and both sides are calm, cool and relaxed. When at a club there are other people making room for discussions, opinions, arguments etc. Even something as simple as one person wants to leave and the other wants to stay may cause a huge conflict.

4. I wanna dance with somebody: Girls like to dance…period. Guys on the other hand normally don’t. In conclusion, at a club a girl will get up and dance but the guy won’t. This means that other people just might come by and dance with your girlfriend…uh oh, here comes another spat. “chou bikkeh wli, mein haydah l khara”, “tab chou ba3mellak iza inta ma baddak tor2ous…stofil!

5. In this animal kingdom you are the prey: This is probably the most important factor of why clubbing can ruin a relationship. People simply do not like to see others happy. Happy couples to unhappy singles look like a baby gazelle to a full-grown cheetah. Single men will eye F*** the S*** out of your girlfriend and single women will pucker their over inflated lips at your beloved boyfriend. People, even friends, will poke fun at your relationship making you feel like you are doing something wrong by being happy together…so you have to think are the nights out worth it?

Conclusion: Will clubbing ruin your relationship? It can if you let your own insecurities take over. All couples need to remember they gave up single life for a reason. In my relationship I think about us as “two against the world”. If people ignore the negatives around them and work hard to defeat them there is no reason why a happy couple can’t enjoy a night of clubbing just like anyone else. Anything done in the extreme is said to be too much, thus it’s not a good idea to over indulge in your relationship in public but also not a good idea to pretend like your relationship is non-existent. Most importantly don’t ignore negative signs, stop them before they end your relationship and most of all have a blast clubbing and enjoying nights out together!!

Nightlife Undercover…Keeping a watchful eye on nightlife 

 

 

11 Responses

  1. Rita D. April 19, 2012

    hahahahhahahha you cracked me up!
    “I always see the same thing from this couple, when I enter the club they are swapping spit at the bar and when I leave the club they are in the corner fighting over why he looked at another girl” was my favorite part!!!

    sadly, the whole thing is so true, which is why i tend to go clubbing a whole lot less when i’m in a relationship. when i’m single, i go clubbing every week, whereas in a relationship, going once every two months is more than enough.
    i think the clubbing culture and atmosphere is very sexually charged and has become a meeting ground for singles searching for other singles — like the jungle culture of the hunter and the prey. they even try to hunt people who are taken. your gazelle example is so true!!
    the main reason singles go out is to meet someone, so when a person still wants to go clubbing excessively even when they’re in a relationship, something is terribly wrong. dvd night or dinner and drinks is a lot more appropriate and convenient in my opinion.
    i love this new column and can’t wait till the next!!!!

     
     
  2. Michelle K. April 19, 2012

    Exactly the point I was going for sweet Rita D. You too are so right!! Thanks for your feed back darling, means a lot :)

     
     
  3. Maroon April 19, 2012

    Right on Michelle!

     
     
  4. Mahmoud Abdullah April 19, 2012

    Impressed!!

     
     
  5. Elie April 19, 2012

    Great Articles Michelle :) loving them

     
     
  6. Youssef April 19, 2012

    this whole article is from one viewpoint of a person who obviously goes to a club for everything but the music .. me and my girlfriend go almost weekly to club nights if there are good djs playing , but certainly wont go for the “sake of clubbing” …
    which raises a very important question .. WHY DO U GO CLUBBING?! just to attract attention, being it social or “romantic”?!?
    “Girls like to dance…period. Guys on the other hand normally don’t. In conclusion, at a club a girl will get up and dance but the guy won’t. ”
    that’s just sad … then what’s the guy doing there in that case? keeping an eye on his girl?! haha pathetic

     
     
  7. Michelle K. April 19, 2012

    @maroon @moe @elie Thank you guys for the feed back! Glad you liked the article :)

     
     
  8. Michelle K. April 19, 2012

    Youssef I agree with you sadly most other people at clubs don’t share the same view as you do. Actually above all I am a music lover, which may be how I realized that people here (usually) are not clubbing for the music but more so to be seen, show off etc. this is when the relationship problems come in. It’s great that you and your lady can go out every week to enjoy the great music and what Lebanon has to offer. Cheers to you both!

     
     
  9. Roland April 23, 2012

    I call it the temple of imperfection:
    The Beauty of the jungle !!!
    A place of loud music called the “rythem of noise” ,
    A place of Alcohol & or drugs called the “abuse of loosing control”,& A place of human dancing instincts called “screaming animals”(Humans)is what we call a CLUB.
    Its one of the places where we live our truth ,our lies & our true lies.
    Its a constant halloween party were evrybody has different masks living the moment of his own illusion & the effect of his own or somebody else’s fantacy.
    We go there because we wanna be there or be seen there or somebody else wants us there or just by mistake we happen to fall there or just simply the “curiosity that killed the cat”…..maybe looking for something to fill our emptiness or find joy & happiness!!????Whatever the reason is we go there??!!!!Why????YOU ASK YOURSELF WHY??

    Its where we love & hate under the motivating influence of lust ,money,sex & power & some other physical or mental unpromissed desires & pleasures of ones life living the dream of achieving the unknown need of the silent person that is burried alive screaming inside through each one of us when we are in that moment of being in the club together with or without somebody between the crowd of unfree lost souls feeling the silence of our mind longing for the freedom & happiness we r looking for…..Joy would be too much to ask for!!!!

    Life happens before, outside,inside, in between & after clubbing.

    It all depends who drives you afterwards!!!!Because if he’s drunk you might crash & end up loosing it (your life) he he he((Oh OH OH IM sorry but not in LEBANON because actually Lebanese people think that they concentrate & drive better when they r drunk ha ha ha ha ha another illusion!!!))..
    So drunk or sober single or in a relation, fresh new relation or overconfident old one, it all depends on how good or bad things effect you for the better or worst …..
    If you r always honest if u r always you no matter where you club or what u drink & how u dance or who u look at & what u say it will make no difference to you or your partner ……
    There is time & place for everything the club is one of those places & one of these times ….
    It all depends on what you are looking for & how do u use this time & this place & for what?? ……….
    It might be only for fun depending on how you define fun!!!!!
    Never take it easy never take it hard just relax but never let go!!?!?
    There is always a cuase & a reason for everything that happens & there is always a reaction for every action so be carefull what you live for because it might not be worth dying for !!!!!!!!!!

    Conclusion:
    Clubbing is for all ages these couples that my Dearest cousin Michelle Kandalaft talked about might turn to be the same couple growing up through time as the years pass by & through different stages of there lives:…when they where fresh first met, with arguments after a while,when they got used to each other, then got so confident, when they got married then trying to live for the old days….All of it they are all one couple to me through the years but she is still missing one stage which is when they grow old together but most probably they won’t be clubbing he he he or maybe they will??!!!……..

    So its all about the human being in the club of life !!!!!!!

    For Michelle Kandalaft & Nightlife in Lebanon I say I am honored & had the pleasure to read your observations & the lovely opinion of one of the aspects of clubbing in Lebanon though i disagrre with those who consider it an ugly side of Lebanon’s nightlife …….Thank you keep it up …..”"”Clubbing for life In Lebanon for all”"”………I like it nightlife udercover!!!!! …….With Love & appreciation……Roland Kandalaft…..

     
     
  10. Michelle K. April 23, 2012

    @Roland Wow!!! Amazing comment! You are a man of many amazing thoughts and ideas. Thank you for reading and sharing your thought provoking insight. much love to you xx

     
     
  11. my relationship April 26, 2012

    I agree with you sadly most other people at clubs don’t share the same view as you do.
    I realized that people here (usually) are not clubbing for the music but more so to be seen, show off etc.
    Thank you for reading and sharing your thought

     
     

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